I made three little hats for the occasion.
They weren't technically secondhand, but I did already have the yarn, so I figured that was close enough. I really liked the way they turned out and I think my cats did too!
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Three Little Hats
A couple at University Friends Meeting is expecting triplets in January, so we had a secondhand baby shower for them after meeting last week. I think Friends cleaned out most of the baby consignment stores in Seattle!
I made three little hats for the occasion.
They weren't technically secondhand, but I did already have the yarn, so I figured that was close enough. I really liked the way they turned out and I think my cats did too!
I made three little hats for the occasion.
They weren't technically secondhand, but I did already have the yarn, so I figured that was close enough. I really liked the way they turned out and I think my cats did too!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
With Love
For someone who claims to be a writer, I sometimes have the hardest time getting writing projects together. My friend Sarah H is on the editorial board for the Quaker Youth Book Project, so I have known about that project for quite some time now. I assured Sarah when I saw her in July that I was planning to submit some writing, but now it's November and I am still trying to decide what to submit.
Most of my Quaker-related writing has been for this blog, so I thought a good place to start would be with some posts that I particularly liked. A few months ago, I created a special "Quaker Youth Book Project" folder on my computer and put a few files in there. Then I ignored them.
Earlier this week, I finally printed out a few of the posts and sat down to edit them. I thought it would be nice to put two posts together, contrasting Freedom Friends Church and University Friends Meeting. But when I got to the piece I had written about University Friends, I felt like I was crossing out more than I was leaving. So much has changed since I wrote it.
I had written all about how I felt like no one knew who I was at University Friends, how unwelcoming they were to young adults, and how I felt that sometimes Friends were doing more editing than listening. This simply has not been my experience at University Friends lately.
A Friend who helped to found our Young Adult Friend group recently visited meeting for worship after a long absence. After meeting she asked, "when did the YAF population at the meeting explode?" It's true. A few weeks ago, I counted ten Friends between the ages of 18 and 35 at meeting, and none of them were there for the first time. Most weeks, we have young visitors and many of them visit repeatedly.
In this Year of Discernment, University Friends Meeting is trying to answer two questions: Who are we as a community? and What are we called to do? When I first started working with the other members of the Steering Committee, I didn't feel like the "we" in those questions applied to me. I was a member of another meeting, and I felt like my role in the process of discernment was to provide an outsider perspective.
This has changed too. Even before I formally became a sojourning member of University Friends Meeting, I began to realize that this was my community too. I have been honored and a little embarrased by the warm welcome I have received from so many members of the meeting. They have given me so many gifts and I feel grateful to have them as friends as well as Friends.
A message from meeting on Sunday has stayed with me through the week. A Friend said that he was struggling with what he was called to do and mentioned, almost as an aside, that he was called to love. This rang true to me. We are called to love. In fact, we are commanded to love God and to love our neighbor.
Today, it occurred to me that this message provides one answer to the questions that University Friends is asking. Who are we as a community? Friends. What are we called to do? Love. I know that there is still a lot of work to do and I doubt that University Friends will be able to simplify in the way that some hope by the end of this Year of Discernment. But if we can do all of the things we are doing with love, maybe that will be enough.
Most of my Quaker-related writing has been for this blog, so I thought a good place to start would be with some posts that I particularly liked. A few months ago, I created a special "Quaker Youth Book Project" folder on my computer and put a few files in there. Then I ignored them.
Earlier this week, I finally printed out a few of the posts and sat down to edit them. I thought it would be nice to put two posts together, contrasting Freedom Friends Church and University Friends Meeting. But when I got to the piece I had written about University Friends, I felt like I was crossing out more than I was leaving. So much has changed since I wrote it.
I had written all about how I felt like no one knew who I was at University Friends, how unwelcoming they were to young adults, and how I felt that sometimes Friends were doing more editing than listening. This simply has not been my experience at University Friends lately.
A Friend who helped to found our Young Adult Friend group recently visited meeting for worship after a long absence. After meeting she asked, "when did the YAF population at the meeting explode?" It's true. A few weeks ago, I counted ten Friends between the ages of 18 and 35 at meeting, and none of them were there for the first time. Most weeks, we have young visitors and many of them visit repeatedly.
In this Year of Discernment, University Friends Meeting is trying to answer two questions: Who are we as a community? and What are we called to do? When I first started working with the other members of the Steering Committee, I didn't feel like the "we" in those questions applied to me. I was a member of another meeting, and I felt like my role in the process of discernment was to provide an outsider perspective.
This has changed too. Even before I formally became a sojourning member of University Friends Meeting, I began to realize that this was my community too. I have been honored and a little embarrased by the warm welcome I have received from so many members of the meeting. They have given me so many gifts and I feel grateful to have them as friends as well as Friends.
A message from meeting on Sunday has stayed with me through the week. A Friend said that he was struggling with what he was called to do and mentioned, almost as an aside, that he was called to love. This rang true to me. We are called to love. In fact, we are commanded to love God and to love our neighbor.
Today, it occurred to me that this message provides one answer to the questions that University Friends is asking. Who are we as a community? Friends. What are we called to do? Love. I know that there is still a lot of work to do and I doubt that University Friends will be able to simplify in the way that some hope by the end of this Year of Discernment. But if we can do all of the things we are doing with love, maybe that will be enough.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Visiting Friends
As everyone around me began to sing at North Seattle Friends Church, I suddenly realized how fragile I felt. I listened to the songs that I knew from my childhood, on the verge of tears. It was strange to hear such familiar music in a Quaker context and I felt pretty disoriented.
The day before, I had my first experience clerking and it did not go well. A variety of factors contributed to a difficult and frustrating committee meeting, and as the numbness after the meeting wore off, I felt extremely vulnerable.
After singing, North Seattle Friends shared God stories, expressing the ways that God is working in their lives. When I am feeling fragile, I am like a sponge for others' sorrow, and the stories about tragedies, both that had occurred or were averted, were hard for me to hear. At the same time, the stories reminded me of how we ask God for help at the beginning of worship at Freedom Friends Church, and that made me feel better.
I couldn't believe it had taken me this long to visit North Seattle Friends Church. When I moved to Seattle, Peggy sent emails of introduction along with me to University Friends Meeting and North Seattle Friends Church, suggesting that I visit both meetings and decide which was a better fit for me. Between studying for the bar exam and sparse Sunday bus schedules, I never quite got around to visiting North Seattle Friends Church.
So there I was, a year and a half late, struggling to hold back tears.
In her message, the pastor asked Friends to share how they experience leadings and what God's nudges feel like to them. This message was especially poignant for me because I was sitting next to Sarah P, who was visiting the meeting with me, and who probably would not be a friend of mine if I had not followed clear leadings.
I met Sarah at the Quaker Women's Theology Conference and we are now friends because God told me that we were both supposed to be on the epistle committee. I was sure that she was going to think I was crazy when I walked up to her, practically a stranger, and said, "I feel led to be on the epistle committee, and I feel led to tell you that you should be too." Instead, she thought for a minute and then nodded. And I am pretty sure that our work together on that committee made us feel that we could accept the responsibility of co-clerking the next conference.
After worship ended, I surrendered to tears. I cried because I was tired and disappointed, because the meeting had been hard, and because I had space to let go. A woman that I did not know sat with me and held my hand. Without asking what was wrong, she prayed for me, that God would help me get through whatever was going on in my life. It felt good.
I am still trying to work through my conflicting feelings about the committee meeting, but I also feel so grateful for all of the support I have had in the past few days. In addition to the Friend who prayed for me, I have received phone calls and emails from friends, family, mentors, and elders, letting me know that they are here to help. I also learned that my sojourning membership with University Friends Meeting was accepted, and I am especially grateful to be under the care of the meeting.
I know that there will be difficult times ahead, but I also know that God is with me. I pray that I can continue to pay attention and follow when I feel God leading.
The day before, I had my first experience clerking and it did not go well. A variety of factors contributed to a difficult and frustrating committee meeting, and as the numbness after the meeting wore off, I felt extremely vulnerable.
After singing, North Seattle Friends shared God stories, expressing the ways that God is working in their lives. When I am feeling fragile, I am like a sponge for others' sorrow, and the stories about tragedies, both that had occurred or were averted, were hard for me to hear. At the same time, the stories reminded me of how we ask God for help at the beginning of worship at Freedom Friends Church, and that made me feel better.
I couldn't believe it had taken me this long to visit North Seattle Friends Church. When I moved to Seattle, Peggy sent emails of introduction along with me to University Friends Meeting and North Seattle Friends Church, suggesting that I visit both meetings and decide which was a better fit for me. Between studying for the bar exam and sparse Sunday bus schedules, I never quite got around to visiting North Seattle Friends Church.
So there I was, a year and a half late, struggling to hold back tears.
In her message, the pastor asked Friends to share how they experience leadings and what God's nudges feel like to them. This message was especially poignant for me because I was sitting next to Sarah P, who was visiting the meeting with me, and who probably would not be a friend of mine if I had not followed clear leadings.
I met Sarah at the Quaker Women's Theology Conference and we are now friends because God told me that we were both supposed to be on the epistle committee. I was sure that she was going to think I was crazy when I walked up to her, practically a stranger, and said, "I feel led to be on the epistle committee, and I feel led to tell you that you should be too." Instead, she thought for a minute and then nodded. And I am pretty sure that our work together on that committee made us feel that we could accept the responsibility of co-clerking the next conference.
After worship ended, I surrendered to tears. I cried because I was tired and disappointed, because the meeting had been hard, and because I had space to let go. A woman that I did not know sat with me and held my hand. Without asking what was wrong, she prayed for me, that God would help me get through whatever was going on in my life. It felt good.
I am still trying to work through my conflicting feelings about the committee meeting, but I also feel so grateful for all of the support I have had in the past few days. In addition to the Friend who prayed for me, I have received phone calls and emails from friends, family, mentors, and elders, letting me know that they are here to help. I also learned that my sojourning membership with University Friends Meeting was accepted, and I am especially grateful to be under the care of the meeting.
I know that there will be difficult times ahead, but I also know that God is with me. I pray that I can continue to pay attention and follow when I feel God leading.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Give Peace a Chance
My brother James and my sister Lael are both off on adventures, travelling through the United States. I can't say I'm not jealous, but it is fun to live vicariously through their stories and pictures. This picture of James's latest stop made me laugh. He looks like such a flower child and his hair is very impressive.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Election Eve
My ballot went out with the mail this morning, so I don't have a lot left to do but wait. It feels like everyone is holding their breath today. No matter what the outcome, I know that some people I love will be elated and other people I love will be disappointed. So my prayer for all of us is that regardless of what happens tomorrow, these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinth. 13:13).
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Joy to the World
When I was in Anchorage over the summer, my sister Rachel asked me which fruit of the spirit I was working on. Without even having to think about it, I responded, "Joy." For a few years, I was actively working on peace―trying to figure out what I think peace means, and what it would look like to have real peace instead of just avoiding conflicts. I don't know that I really answered either of those questions, but now I am asking them about joy.
A couple months ago, I listened to a Joyce Meyer podcast about the fruit of the spirit that really caught my attention. She said that whatever you pray for, that's what will be tested. She was specifically talking about patience, but I knew as soon as I heard her that this would apply to any of them. Since I had already been praying for joy for a few months by then, I was a little worried about what testing my joy might look like.
Turns out, it looks like pneumonia, financial crises (both in the country and personal), political scandal in my home state, a frustrating job search, and a lot of feeling overwhelmed. Now, I'm not saying that my prayers are somehow responsible for all of those things, but it has been a little difficult to work on joy in the midst of them.
And yet, there is joy. I have been grateful for so many things this week. The retreat at University Friends Meeting on Saturday went so much better than I could ever have hoped, and I can feel the excitement in the air there about the Year of Discernment.
Last night, I met with my clearness committee again and I am having trouble finding words to describe how wonderful that was. At one point during the clearness committee, a Friend suggested that an experience I had was an example of way opening. As soon as she said it, I had the indescribable feeling that I get when way opens, and I feel led to the next clear step. It was so helpful to be reminded of that feeling because I feel like so much of what I have been doing lately has been because I feel like I have to, not because I feel led.
I am also grateful that I got a chance to talk to Alivia last night. I have been sorely missing music in my life lately, and I was excited to tell her that I am planning on joining a Christmas choir. When I told her, she said that it was good for me to get some music back into the mix, but asked what was I planning on giving up. I knew immediately what needed to go, a committee that has felt wrong for me from the beginning. This morning, I sent an email explaining that I did not feel called to that particular ministry at this time. It felt very good.
I know that the fruit of the spirit is not something that I can force. But I believe that if I am faithful and follow where God leads me, the fruit of the spirit will come. I am also working on letting go of things, including my ideas of what I should be doing. For now, Cat Stevens speaks to my condition:
I listen to the wind
To the wind of my soul
Where I'll end up well I think,
Only God really knows
I've sat upon the setting sun
But never, never never never
I never wanted water once
No, never, never, never
I listen to my words but
They fall far below
I let my music take me where
My heart wants to go
I swam upon the devil's lake
But never, never never never
I'll never make the same mistake
No, never, never, never
A couple months ago, I listened to a Joyce Meyer podcast about the fruit of the spirit that really caught my attention. She said that whatever you pray for, that's what will be tested. She was specifically talking about patience, but I knew as soon as I heard her that this would apply to any of them. Since I had already been praying for joy for a few months by then, I was a little worried about what testing my joy might look like.
Turns out, it looks like pneumonia, financial crises (both in the country and personal), political scandal in my home state, a frustrating job search, and a lot of feeling overwhelmed. Now, I'm not saying that my prayers are somehow responsible for all of those things, but it has been a little difficult to work on joy in the midst of them.
And yet, there is joy. I have been grateful for so many things this week. The retreat at University Friends Meeting on Saturday went so much better than I could ever have hoped, and I can feel the excitement in the air there about the Year of Discernment.
Last night, I met with my clearness committee again and I am having trouble finding words to describe how wonderful that was. At one point during the clearness committee, a Friend suggested that an experience I had was an example of way opening. As soon as she said it, I had the indescribable feeling that I get when way opens, and I feel led to the next clear step. It was so helpful to be reminded of that feeling because I feel like so much of what I have been doing lately has been because I feel like I have to, not because I feel led.
I am also grateful that I got a chance to talk to Alivia last night. I have been sorely missing music in my life lately, and I was excited to tell her that I am planning on joining a Christmas choir. When I told her, she said that it was good for me to get some music back into the mix, but asked what was I planning on giving up. I knew immediately what needed to go, a committee that has felt wrong for me from the beginning. This morning, I sent an email explaining that I did not feel called to that particular ministry at this time. It felt very good.
I know that the fruit of the spirit is not something that I can force. But I believe that if I am faithful and follow where God leads me, the fruit of the spirit will come. I am also working on letting go of things, including my ideas of what I should be doing. For now, Cat Stevens speaks to my condition:
I listen to the wind
To the wind of my soul
Where I'll end up well I think,
Only God really knows
I've sat upon the setting sun
But never, never never never
I never wanted water once
No, never, never, never
I listen to my words but
They fall far below
I let my music take me where
My heart wants to go
I swam upon the devil's lake
But never, never never never
I'll never make the same mistake
No, never, never, never
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Not So Silent Worship
Scene: University Friends Meeting
Friends settle into silent worship. The Holy Spirit walks around slowly. Friends leave some silence between speaking.
Friend One: Did I remember to turn my cell phone off? At least my ring tone is set to Simple Gifts!
Friend Two: What does “hold in the light” mean?
Friend Three walks in late.
Friend Three: I really hate being late to meeting. I hope no one noticed!
The Holy Spirit walks toward Friend Four and taps her on the shoulder.
Friend Four: Is this really a message? Do I have to stand up? I don’t see what this has to do with anything―maybe I’m just hungry.
The Holy Spirit taps more insistently, then tries to pull Friend Four out of her seat.
Friend Four: I really don’t want to talk, so I don’t think it’s a message for the group. Maybe next week . . .
Friend Five: I really liked that book I read last week. Maybe I should talk about it and give folks something to think about during meeting.
As the Holy Spirit is still trying to pull Friend Four out of her seat, Friend Five starts to stand. The Holy Spirit is surprised. The Holy Spirit walks over to Friend Five and tries to make Friend Five sit.
Friend Six: Oh no, not another political message!
The Holy Spirit gives up on trying to quiet Friend Five.
Friend One: Not more of that Jesus talk!
Friend Two: I wonder what’s for light lunch?
The Holy Spirit shakes his head and puts a finger to his lips. The Holy Spirit puts his hand on A Friend’s shoulder. A Friend stands to speak, a little uncertainly.
[Concept and script developed by the Steering Committee for University Friends Meeting's Year of Discernment. Editorial and moral support by QB. Friends performed this skit for the First All-Meeting Retreat in the Year of Discernment.]
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